Arcade fun

Wu Yi had another breakthrough today ~ engaging and having fun with some friends of mine and their kids.  We went to a local arcade/water park and she had a great time playing arcade games, climbing in the indoor play area, chasing people around, and watching the kids in the water park.  She held my friend Cheryl's hand, offered her french fries to everyone, and teased anyone who wanted to play with her.  She was also pretty bold in not needing to keep me in her sight at all times.  She never went too far away, but she is becoming more and more confident. You would never know the trauma she has recently been through to watch her today! Too bad Don was up skiing.

The water park was too overwhelming for her.  This didn't surprise me ~ I'm pretty sure she has never been in a swimsuit, and she seems pretty surprised to see such "scantily clad" adults and kids.  She even seems surprised to see her brothers in their PJ's when they choose to not wear a shirt.  She is a very modest little girl.

Cleft Palate

Today we went to visit the surgeon who will be correcting Wu Yi's cleft palate.  We liked him very much and Wu Yi was cooperative during the exam.  We have tentatively scheduled the surgery to happen April 20 (assuming we don't have any insurance glitches) and she will have to spend one or two nights at the Children's Hospital.  We were told that she would have a fair amount of pain for 7-10 days, and that each day would be better than the one before.  She will also have to be on a soft food diet for 2 weeks.  Fortunately, her ramen noodles and rice are ok.  I am glad to be getting it done while I am still on maternity leave and I feel like there is no reason to delay.  She isn't speaking at all right now, and the sooner we get this done, the sooner we can address any speech therapy needs she may require.  I feel like Wu Yi and I have a strong enough relationship to get through this together and she seems to trust what I say and do.
For those of you who are not familiar with cleft lip and cleft palate, I will give you a quick rundown.  These disorders occur during fetal development and, although not completely understood, are most likely attributed to lack of folate in the mother during pregnancy.  It is relatively common, even in the US.  With cleft lip, there is a split that divides the upper lip and sometimes travels all the way up into the nose.  With cleft palate, the split travels from the front to the back of the palate ~ the roof of your mouth.  There are varying degrees to which either one of these disorders may exist and they may occur together or alone.  Wu Yi was born with both.  She had surgery to fix her lip shortly after her birth mother abandoned her when she was a toddler.  Her palate was never repaired.  If you looked in her mouth, you would see a split about the width of your finger which goes from the back of her upper teeth all the way back to her throat.  Its like a shadowy canyon.  It basically means that she has an opening from her mouth which travels up into her sinuses.  Sometimes these kids don't eat well.  Babies can have a hard time sucking and oftentimes the food will end up coming out their noses.  They can also get frequent ear infections from fluids which back up all the way into their ears.  These kids usually have some speech issues as they have to force their tongue against the cleft to block the sound from coming out of their nose.  Their voices are often described as "nasally".  Wu Yi eats fine and has never had anything come back out of her nose.  She does have kind of a "harsh" speech pattern but I'm not sure how much of that was just her language. We are hearing mixed predictions about her needs for speech therapy ~ some professionals have told us that just learning a new language may be all she needs to do.  The surgery alone will make it so that her tongue will have to get used to moving in a different way.
The surgery sounds a bit gruesome.  The surgeon will basically be peeling off the lining of the roof of her mouth and then stretching it across to cover the cleft opening.  Ideally, this should have been done when she was 18 months old.  At the age of almost 8 (her birthday is this Friday!) the roof of her mouth has expanded enough to make the surgery a bigger challenge.  Our surgeon is optimistic that the repair can be done with just one procedure, but it is possible that she may need one more.  Then, around the age of 10 (when most of her baby teeth are out) she will need another surgery which puts a permanent bone graft in.  And finally, when she is a teenager and mostly grown, she will have some cosmetic touch-ups to her nose ~ her left nostril is very flat and wide.  Other than her cleft palate, Wu Yi is very healthy.  We do have her scheduled for a hearing test in case she had frequent infections.  However, her ears look good now and she doesn't have any obvious hearing problems so I am not too concerned.
We are on spring break this week, so Don has been home alot more than usual, and Wu Yi still is not comfortable when he is around.  She becomes the withdrawn child she was in China and it is a BIG BUMMER!  I took her to the park without Don on Saturday and she livened right up and, frankly, is a total daredevil on climbing walls and fireman poles.  She is getting more and more bold on the swing as well.  There were lots of other kids there and she was completely as ease with them.  Of course, none of them were paying any attention to her ~ that is totally her preference!  She is comfortable being anonymous and detests being the center of attention.  A tiny little firecracker of a girl!

Happy photos and Stranger anxiety

I think its been a week since I've posted.  For awhile, there were so many new things happening with Wu Yi, and I guess now it feels like we are settling into a routine.  Don and I are fully recovered from the trip, and although it is still hard for me to get used to being at home instead of work, I am finding a routine that seems to be satisfying for the two of us girls.
For the most part, she is doing very well!  She continues to bond with me and her brothers ~ she laughs easily, is well behaved, is hesitantly trying new American foods (even the food she picks out from the Asian food market doesn't seem to taste right to her), sleeps great, is playing more, watching fewer Chinese cartoons, and occasionally will do some school-type activities with me.  She also likes to cook with me and seems to know what she is doing at the stove.  (Maybe she can teach me a few things!) She has not cried since her last phone call to the nannies which she made while we were still in China.  She is understanding more and more English, although she still is not speaking at all.  If she needs to communicate with me, she uses hand signals, or grabs my sleeve and pulls me to what she wants.  If we are in the car and she sees a dog or a park, she grunts and points.  Her favorite DVD to watch is Cinderella, which we have in both Chinese and English.  Yesterday, she was watching it while I was doing laundry in another room, and I heard her quietly singing along to a song in Chinese!  It was wonderful to hear ~ except for when she laughs, she is so quiet.
A few days ago, I developed some photos which were taken of her prior to our trip.  I had mailed a couple of disposable cameras to the orphanage in December with the hope that we could get a glimpse of her life in China.  It was such a wonderful gift to get back over 40 photos of Wu Yi ~ both inside and outside of her orphanage as well as her school.  They included pictures of her closest friends, nannies, and teachers and seemed to be very open about the details of her daily life.  I had this impression that the orphanage may have been a place that was trying to "hide" from adoptive families, but these photos were very open and honest and I was very touched.  Of course, Wu Yi was thrilled to receive them as well and we put her own copies into a special album for her to keep in her room and they were immediately "hidden" in her special school backpack that contains every item that was hers prior to meeting us.  She rarely opens that backpack, but I know it is her most prized possession.  One day, I did sneak a few items out of it (school work) so that I could have it translated in order to get an idea of what she had been doing at school.  It was mostly writing, simple math, and language, along with some health/nutrition stuff.  There was, however, a letter written by a teacher on behalf of the class, which told Wu Yi how much they would all miss her, to study hard and be a good girl for her new parents, and not to forget her friends whose names were listed at the end of the note.  There was a "PS" at the bottom of the note addressed to Don and I which asked us to take good care of her and to please continue her education.  I was feeling guilty about sneaking into her private stuff until finding that letter.  It might have sat there until she couldn't read it anymore and we would never have known it had existed.  I'm not even sure if she knows it is there.  It has been painful for me to know just how much she was loved in China and it is hard not to question if all of this is "for the best".  Of course I am grateful that she was well cared for and, of course, I know she did not have a good future over there.  It is just sad to know that some people in this world are left with situations that have to be so difficult.
Despite how well Wu Yi is doing with so many things, she still has anxiety about people in general.  She is comfortable being outside of the house with me, but if someone approaches her ~ even if just to say hello ~ she withdraws into herself and ignores them.  This includes people who try to speak Chinese to her.  This includes other kids,  This, unfortunately, includes Don.  It is heartbreaking to see her reject him like this.  Even if all 6 of us are together, if Don is around, she "shuts down".  She puts her head down to hide her face behind her hair and refuses to play or acknowledge whatever situation we are in.  It is difficult for Don to decide if he should keep trying to engage her, or to just walk away because she looks so stressed out.  I think we just need to keep working on it as a family. She has only known us for a little over a month.  Today is the first day of our spring break ~ wish us luck!

PS ~ While I was writing this, Kellen got her to try on some new tennis shoes.  Farewell red snowboots!!

Laughter and boundaries

Things continue to go well for our new family of 6!  The amazing girl that Wu Yi became last Friday continues to grace our prescence.  She loves to laugh and it only takes a simple game or bit of teasing to get her started.  She adores all of her brothers, she loves the dog, and she has bonded pretty tightly with me.  Don has been so busy back to work this week and with track practice ~ Wu Yi is taking a little time still getting to know her Baba.
We enjoyed some nice weather over the weekend and gave the local park a try on Saturday.  Evan saw some buddies there to play with and Wu Yi immediately became withdrawn and uninterested.  So, we went to a friends house to feed their pets while they were out of town ~ 2 dogs, 2 cats, 2 rabbits ~ Wu Yi was in HEAVEN!  She really enjoys feeding and petting animals!  (I keep hoping Sami won't get sick from so many milkbones!).   Sunday was so beautiful, we tried the park again, and this time Wu Yi gave it a shot!  I had to push Evan and Kellen on the swings for awhile and then she pushed them.  Then I got on the swing and she pushed me.  Then, after a 1/2 hr of pushing, she decided to give it a try!  Unfortunately, it became apparent that she has never been on a swing and she got pretty scared.  So, she tried the "baby" swing, and got a little stuck in it (well, just the red snow boots got stuck I guess).  But then she discovered the slides, bridges, and ladders and she was all over the place!  The park was busy with other families and it was hard for folks not to stare at this tiny girl who laughs so loud and long!  Some girls from our elementary school were there and recognized Wu Yi from photos I had shown their 2nd grade class ~ they immediately came over and were dying to know when she would be coming to school!  Such sweet kids at Bryan!  Wu Yi spent over an hour playing a game with Evan, Kellen, and Kellen's friend Jack ~ the nature of the game was Wu Yi chasing the boys down, grabbing them by the shirt, and dragging them to "jail".  Then she would sternly point at them to "stay" and she would smile and walk away and wait for them to inevitably try to escape.  Then she would chase them down again!  She can usually make herself understood, despite never saying a word!  What a personality she has!
On Monday, I decided to take her to school with Evan.  I knew she would be bored at home without him.  There was quite a commotion when we entered the building ~ Wu Yi's arrival from China is well known throughout the school, and kids and teachers alike were excited to finally see her.  We went to visit Evan's class first, and then Evan's teacher allowed him to leave class to stay with Wu Yi for as long as necessary.  So, the three of us went to Wu Yi's 2nd grade class, where she was greeted by Mrs Godbout and her students with a teddy bear gift and a large poster which said "welcome Wu Yi" in Chinese characters!  We are so blessed to live in such a wonderful community and have such great schools!  We stayed in class for about an hour, just coloring and doing dot-to-dots.  As I listened to the lesson plan of the class, I became pretty intimidated by the level of learning taking place.  How will Wu Yi ever catch up?  What does she already know?  How is this transition to school going to take place?  Will she be ready for me to leave when my maternity leave ends?  AAAGGGHHH!  :)
Wu Yi continues to get comfortable in our home.  She has explored every drawer and cupboard, found all the best places for hide-and-go-seek, and freely helps herself to food in the kitchen.  With this new confidence, comes testing!  NO, you can't eat in the living room (the kitchen is ok).  NO, you can't watch Chinese cartoons 24/7 (maybe 2 hours a day).  NO, you can't shoot kids or pets in the face with the nerf gun (other body parts are ok).  NO, you can't douse mom with a cup of water during the bath (but squirts from the tub toys are ok).  NO, you can't stall bedtime with one more book (well, actually you probably could cause mom loves to read to you, but not when you have stopped listening and are just bouncing on the bed!).  Life with a 7 year old toddler!
Well, for those of you complaining about me not writing in my blog ~ there you go!  Less and less about adopting a child, and more and more about normal parenting.  I appreciate all of the kind words and support from those of you I know, and those I haven't met yet.  I guess this will be an interesting read for Wu Yi when she is ready, so thanks for putting so much pressure on me to keep at it! :)

JOY!

Today someone turned a light on in Wu Yi . . . and his name was EVAN!!  BIG BROTHER EXTRAORDINAIRE!  There was no school for Evan today, so the three of us spent the day together, and by noon, she was smiling at him.  Smiling so big that she would get embarrassed and turn her back to him so she couldn't see his antics!  His tactics were simple ~ give her milkbones to feed the dog (or tease the dog as it may be!) and make goofy faces at her.  By midafternoon, he had her laughing as they chased each other around the coffee table.  By evening, she was bouncing off the walls engaging him in pillow fights and nerf wars (good thing our dog, Sami, doesn't mind being shot by foam bullets ~ she did get 1/2 box of dog treats in return!).  And she is not just engaging Evan, she has also totally opened up to the rest of us and Grandma Janice too!   That girl had to have had a stomach ache by bedtime for all the laughing she was doing.  In addition to laughing and playing, she did some coloring and dot-to-dots ~ which she could easily do from 1-20!  I've only known this girl for 3 weeks and I had NO IDEA she could shine so bright!  Yep, 3 weeks of grief were made up for in fun today.  I am completely stunned!  Way to go Evan!
 

A first smile!

I remember the day Daniel (my oldest son) gave me his first smile.  He was a couple of months old and had an appointment with the pediatrician for a slew of vaccinations.  As a new mom, I was dreading this!  So, to adequately prepare Daniel for this trauma, I laid him down on my lap, looked him in the eyes, and explained to him why its so important to be immunized ~ that it will hurt for a minute, but that I will give him lots of hugs when we are done.  (Yes, I did say he was two MONTHS old, but I'm one of those moms!)  It was supposed to be a very serious discussion, but Daniel apparently thought it was amusing, because when the conversation was over, he showed me the biggest, gummy smile ever!  Then, at my delight over him, he continued to smile for almost a half hour.  How could life be any better than that?
Well, Wu Yi's first smile lasted only a few seconds, but it was just about as great!  I was getting her out of the bathtub yesterday ~ oh, did I forget to mention that I gave her a BATH???  WITH NO TEARS, NO FIGHTING, NO BIG DEAL??? Yes, yesterday I told Wu Yi that it was bathtime.  We had successfully been getting dressed without issues for several days, but no bath since the "prying fingers off the towel rack incident" in Guangzhou.  She was parked in her "usual" spot on the couch and could probably hear the bath water running.  She got up, and walked to the bathroom and started getting herself undressed.  O-M-G!  I lifted her into the tub and frantically started playing with the tub toys to distract her.  Well, she still isn't interested in toys and seemed to be irritated everytime a rubber ducky ran into her, but I played with ducks and boats to my hearts content for a good 20 minutes.  (No I don't have a fascination with tub toys ~ I was just stalling as I tried to figure out what to do next!)  She patiently waited for me to grab the soap and "get to work" (well, how would YOU feel giving a 7 year old a bath when you don't speak her language and have no idea how she usually does it??).  Anyway, we got through it and I breathed a sigh of relief and lifted her out and into a towel.  I decided to be playful with toweling her off (little peek-a-boo, little tickling, little "crazy hair style") and she gave me back a genuine smile!!!  What a great day! 
I've given up on sitting home with her all day.  Don has returned to work, the boys are in school, and the two of us girls are BORED!  We drop Evan off at school and she shows some mild interest watching him cross the busy playground.  We go out for a latte and experiment trying different smoothy flavors for her.  Yesterday we met friends at Carl's Jr for lunch and tried to tempt her to play in the big playland.  (She wouldn't go in to play, but she ate a kids meal and watched the other kids play).  When I tell her we are going somewhere, she finds her coat and boots (still wearing her red snowboots!), gets herself in the car, tries to buckle up, and is ready to go!  She is definitely going to fit in as a Walters!
This morning, I was eating breakfast and didn't know that she had gotten out of bed until she came up behind me and said "Mama" and then headed for cartoons.  Thats all she said.  She didn't follow it up with "I have to go potty" ~ just basically saying good morning to me I guess.  Another first!

Adjusting to home

We have been home for 3 days now and I am happy to be sleeping in my own bed.  Unfortunately, I am waking up many times at night trying to figure out where I am.  I can't recall the last time I was away from home for so long, plus China was overwhelming, we are still adjusting to being a "family of 6", and its weird to not be going to work. (Yes, I miss you guys!)
I haven't posted to the blog for several days, mostly because I have no photos to share.  Wu Yi really doesn't like me taking them, and I just don't want to line up three smiling boys and an unhappy girl.  Maybe next week?
Although it is difficult to see Wu Yi so unhappy, she is making some progress.  She seems to be becoming more and more comfortable in our house.  She no longer waits to ask to use the bathroom or to get out of bed ~ she now takes the initiative to just do it on her own.  She doesn't fuss over clothes changing at all (just wants the door closed).  She continues to sleep great all night by herself in her own room, and when she is awake, she parks herself on one corner of the couch and watches cartoons.  She only moves from that spot for meals or to go to the bathroom.  If the TV is off, she sits quietly studying her hands.  The boys and I have tried to engage her in various play activities and she either shakes her head "no" when asked to join in, or just ignores the request.  Most of the day, I have just left toys laying around in case she takes the initiative on her own.  "Pushing" her doesn't seem to be the answer, but it is hard to watch her sit an entire day doing nothing.  Its also very hard for me to just sit with her.  I am feeling so unproductive, even though I know being near her is "something".  After several months of a hiatus, I have started going for short runs again this week.  Thank goodness for that!
We have taken her out for various errands and she is perfectly fine "tagging along".  Although we mostly want her at home for awhile, it doesn't seem to bother her at all to get in the car.  She had her first Dr's appt today and was very cooperative through it all.  She had to get 3 shots and she started to cry when I told her what was going to happen.  She held very still during them and when I hugged her afterward, she actually leaned into me and seemed comforted by me.  We go to the dentist on Friday and to the Cleft Lip and Palate board next week.  Unless something unexpected shows up on these next physical exams, I have decided to wait until this summer to put her through surgery to close her palate.  She has no problems eating, drinking, or even sucking through a straw and I haven't seen anything come back out through her nose. Her initial exam today showed no health problems.
I underestimated the food issue!  Her diet is really very different from ours.  She prefers rice noodles over anything else and lots of spices that are unfamiliar to me.  Thanks so much Penny for bringing over all those Asian groceries for us to sample!  It doesn't help that I hate to cook and am tired of eating Chinese food!  :)
Today Wu Yi made me totally hold my breath and curse to myself when she got into her precious backpack and pulled out her little phone book.  I had hoped if she didn't see a phone in our house (and I've kind of hidden them) that she wouldn't ask to make any calls.  At this point, I really  don't think its a good idea for her to be in contact with the orphanage.  She gets so emotional, I don't know what is being said on the other end of the line (more lies promising future visits?), and I need her to bond with us  a little more and start to understand that this is permanent.  I am going to hate to tell her "no" on this one (at least for awhile) and  I am missing hearing her talk!!  I pretended not to notice while she carefully scanned the pages of numbers, and fortunately, after a few minutes, she tucked it back away.
All in all, its going better than I thought it would.  What I wouldn't give for a smile (ok, I got one when the Dr did the abdominal exam and it tickled her ~ she immediately covered her mouth and tried to suppress it) or for her to want to play.  I know, I know!  It will happen.  Its just very hard to see this sadness in such a precious child.

Back in the USA!

We got up early yesterday to get ready to start the long trip home.  I told Wu Yi that she needed clean clothes and she shook her head no;  I smiled and nodded my head, and she basically shrugged her shoulders and let me do it without a peep!  I wanted to cry with happiness!  I know the clothes/bath thing might not seem like a big deal to anyone reading this, but I hate feeling like I am molesting this child when she needs to be cleaned up!  Bring on the next bath!! :)
Wu Yi must have known something was up the night before with all of the packing.  I waited until that morning to tell her we were leaving on a plane for America (which in Chinese translation means beautiful place).  I was worried what her reaction might be, but she seemed calm and ready to go.  We met up with the Chen's, and at the airport, met two other Seattle area adoptive families who were on the same flight with us.  The long flights were fairly uneventful (except trying to find our luggage in Beijing ~ bless you Johnny!) and I am absolutely amazed at how patient Wu Yi is.  She sat on 3 long flights, waited in airport lines surrounded by 4 families who were speaking only English to each other, and endured a fair amount of walking (carrying her precious heavy backpack) as we wandered from terminal to terminal.  She never seemed upset or frustrated, she just quietly went along with the group.  There were 3 other girls near her age with us, and she continued on her quest to "have no fun".  She did enjoy getting to have her own TV screen on the 12 hour flight with several Chinese cartoons to choose from, and she slept for almost half of the trip.  We had one brief "testing" moment when she refused to keep her seatbelt buckled (the Chinese cab drivers scolded us for trying to buckle her there!), but when Don sternly "shook his finger" at her, she decided to remain buckled the rest of the time.  She really is a well behaved little girl. (And you know how Don is such a tough guy!)
We were treated to family greeting us at the Spokane airport and I broke down and sobbed when I saw my 3 boys all holding up large hand-made banners welcoming us home!  What in the world were their grandmas feeding them for 2 weeks that made them each grow a foot taller!!  I feel so happy to be home!  China was a great life experience and the people were very good to us there, but nothing beats living in this great country and especially the beautiful Pacific NW.

Daniel, Kellen, and Evan were all so eager to meet and play with Wu Yi, and they have spent the evening looking up Chinese phrases to talk to her, and have been very understanding that she isn't quite sure of the situation and not ready to play or talk yet.  They are determined to get her to cheer up ~ go for it boys!  She seems to be doing ok in the house.  I gave her a preliminary tour of the main floor and showed her how to use the toilet/faucets/etc.  Daniel and Kellen want her to check out their rooms downstairs, but we will do that tomorrow.  Our house is big and I don't want her to get confused.  She seems ok with our dog ~ I've just had the boys keep Sami quiet and not too close yet.  At bedtime, she obediently walked to her room and climbed into bed.  She never has any issues at bedtime which is great because she has to be exhausted every single day (both physically and emotionally).  The boys want to "take her out on the town" tomorrow and are disappointed that I think we need to stay put at home for at least a few more days.  (Hard for all of us ~ we are definitely a family on the go!).  I will probably need to catch up on sleep anyway.  In the last 36 hours, I've only slept 30 minutes.  Why am I still up writing??  See ya.

Day 12 ~ Last day in China!

Sorry to not post any new photos of Wu Yi today.  She really doesn't like being photographed so I decided to cut her some slack.  I must say she looked just as cute today as she does everyday.  No smiles yet, but she walked with a little more "spring in her step" than usual. We will take these tiny hints of progress whenever we can get them.  (To Marta and Cheryl ~ I need more coaching on styling little girl hair!  She will only accept barrettes, and they keep falling out!)
Early in our arrival, Don asked our guide Elsie if she could get him into a local school for a tour.  Initially she didn't think it was likely, as even parents don't usually go into schools ~ they wait for their kids outside.  But, she pulled some strings, and this morning Don got to spend almost an hour in a nearby high school.  This school is highly regarded, with 95% of students expected to go on to college.  They wear "sweatsuit-like" uniforms, each age group assigned a different color.  The classes are very crowded (59 students in one class) and students attend class Mon-Fri 7:30-12 and 2:30-5:30.  All school kids get a mid-day break ~ in fact, many working people have a long lunch break as well.  Wu Yi was taking a daily nap during this school break. (She started attending 1st grade last fall).  The teacher who accompanied Don on the tour was amazed that US high school students aren't all lining up to take advantage of AP classes.  Local school kids generally study pretty hard here, and can be expelled for behaviors that are common among American teens.
I spent the morning with the Chen's on Shamian Island for some last minute shopping.  This island is very beautiful with lots of peaceful streets lined with flowers and shade trees.  It was once heavily populated by Europeans, and the architecture is very colonial.  It is in the middle of the city (did I mention Guangzhou has almost 12 million people in the surrounding area?) and it is a popular place for weddings and wedding photos. Today we watched a big tour bus bring in at least 6 wedding parties to have pictures taken. Chinese weddings are elaborate affairs! Shamian also used to be "adoption central" as the US Consulate used to be there, and the Immigration Medical Office is still there and we still saw lots of adoptive families wandering around.  While the Chen's shopped, Wu Yi and I hung out at Starbucks for a latte (me) and an orange sucker (Wu Yi).  My latte cost as much as most of my dinners here have (about $5).  After shopping, we headed for a cute little park with lots of playground equipment.  As soon as Wu Yi saw it, she turned around and pulled my hand to walk away from it!  That girl is really stubborn!  She likes to watch Chinese DVD's in the hotel room, so we went to the store to let her pick out one more video.  She chose what looks like a Chinese version of "Power Rangers".  Hopefully her brothers will like it too!
Lunch was at KFC.  Notice the little eyes on the crab cakes!
We are heading home tomorrow!!!!  We have to check out of the hotel by 6 am to catch an 8:30 flight to Beijing, then we have a 4 hour layover until we board our 12 hour flight to Seattle. In Seattle, we say goodbye to our good friends, Johnny, Angela, and Jesse Chen. Then its a 3 hour wait for our flight to Spokane.  We land (after 26 hours of travel) at 2:55 on Saturday afternoon.  Then a quick 45 minute drive home to Coeur d'Alene!  Excitement and dread at the same time!  :)  Can't wait to see everyone!  We have missed our family and friends!

Day 11 ~ Zoo and a bath

I tossed and turned all night dreading that today needed to be a bath day.  I had put it off for an entire week and it was time.  Wu Yi has only had one bath since she left the orphanage, and that was last week with our guide Wendy (you may recall that I was not allowed in the bathroom).  So this morning, as soon as we got up, I announced the bad news.  She shook her head no and backed away.  I talked to her as cheerfully and soothingly as I could, using both Chinese and English phrases but all she did was shake her head and grab the towel rack with both hands.   I had no choice but to peel her fingers away, undress her, and put her in the tub.  She screamed and cried for her "grandma" ~ the poor girl is just mortified about being undressed.  She wouldn't sit down in the water, but fortunately the bath had a hand held shower, so I just washed her that way.  Too bad it ended up being quick ~ I had hoped that once she sat down she might relax and enjoy it (she seemed to with Wendy).  After we toweled off and got dressed, she furiously glared at me from the bathroom and wouldn't come out for about 10 minutes.  At least she didn't kick or hit me.  (She hasn't ever done anything like that before, but she was pretty mad and I wasn't sure if she would try it).  By breakfast she seemed to have forgiven me. It will be better next time ~ right???
We took the subway to the zoo today.  It was our first time on a Chinese subway, and Don, once again, for the 3rd time, got in trouble for taking pictures.  I'm sure China will celebrate when Don leaves the country! :) The Chen's little boy Jesse has an ear infection, so it was Don and I with the two "new" families.  We were happy to have three 6 year old girls in the group (only one speaking Chinese) for Wu Yi to play with.  The zoo was really nice with lots of cool animals and beautiful flowers and trees.  Wu Yi seemed to be in a better mood and enjoyed feeding some ducks, but she chose to mostly ignore the other girls.  She seems bound and determined to not have any fun, and my guess is that she may associate enjoying herself with "giving up" on her hopes to go back to the orphanage.  I'm no psych major, but that is my theory.
After Jesse got some antibiotics, he was feeling better (he's the cutest 1 year old baby ever!) so we went out for Muslim food with the Chen's.  We watched the cooks making fresh pasta ~ it puts tossing pizza to shame!  Then we spent the evening exploring some streets a few blocks away from the hotel and found some trendy bars and hotspots as well as more street markets with an amazing array of fresh fruit.  We have been cautioned to only eat fruit with a rind on it, so unfortunately we aren't eating much fruit.
Have a safe trip home Shelly, Brad, and Ella Grace!  We will miss you!

Day 10 ~ Lucy's and New Friends

Wu Yi and I slept in until 9 this morning!  She is an awesome sleeper and I stay up too late at night on the computer having my daily "me" time.  Don has been getting up early to put on his running shoes and explore the streets of Guangzhou.  Fortunately he doesn't take his camera on his runs, so I can trust he will stay out of trouble and make it back to the hotel safely.  :)  Then its down to breakfast ~ Wu Yi is no longer shy about letting us know what she wants to eat (from the buffet or pointing to pictures on menus) and its always fun to see what she eats.  She likes quite a variety and she can really eat alot!
We spent the morning taking a taxi back to Shamian Island with the McCains and Chens for one last shopping trip ~ we are so sad to be saying goodbye to the McCains as they leave for home tomorrow.  Don has mastered the fine art of "bargaining with little Chinese women" for souveniers ~ they probably only chuckled a little to the bank this time.  We went to the White Swan Hotel looking for the famous "red couch" that adopted kids all line up for photos on, only to find out that the couch no longer exists.  There are "other" red couches there, but we decided to spare Wu Yi the agony of another photo.  She really doesn't like to be on camera, and today she actually pushed me away from her when I tried to pose for a photo.  Then it was off to lunch at the famous "Lucy's" ~ a restaurant in the park on Shamian that caters to the American families who have had enough Chinese food.  We sat outside and ate spaghetti and burgers ~ beautiful scenery and beautiful weather here!
We spent the afternoon at the Yunsai Gardens and enjoyed displays of colorful flowers ~ Wu Yi still not a big fan of walking around, but an ice cream cone always perks her up. :)
This evening, we went out for Malaysian food (yes, we are eating almost constantly here!) with two other WACAP families that just arrived.  It is such a sense of community here with other adoptive families thoughout our hotel.  One of the families (from Ohio) is adopting a 6 year old and we sat next to them at our table.  We are excited about this because, so far, we haven't met anyone adopting a child near the age of WuYi.  The two girls didn't talk to each other, but Wu Yi definitely noticed that the other girl was speaking Chinese.  She stared at her through much of the meal.  We are going to the zoo with them tomorrow.  I hope Wu Yi has fun.  She seems bored, sad, or angry most of the day.  She did call the orphanage today and cried a bit ~ its been a full 3 days of no crying.  I'm actually glad she had an opportunity to break down and not be so strong.  Such a huge transition for such a small girl.

Missing my boys!

Day 9 ~ Taking the oath

I couldn't change Wu Yi's clothes last night while she slept ~ combination of guilt and waking her up!  So, this morning, first thing, I told her we needed to put on clean clothes and I just did it.  She wasn't pleased and resisted for a bit, but once she knew I wasn't going to take no for an answer, she relented a bit.  I think she is pretty modest (she covered her eyes with her hands when Don was just wearing a towel after showering) and I tried to keep her covered as best I could ~ poor girl.  It is a relief to have it done though!  After getting her dressed I realized I didn't have her shoes ready, but by the time I grabbed them, she had put her red snowboots on!  Its her signature look though and I don't plan on taking them away.  Now its time to tackle the bath.  I will leave that for tomorrow.  One trauma at a time :)
We went to the US Consulate this morning to finalize Wu Yi's passport and to take the oath on her behalf for her US citizenship.  I though this would mean she was to become a citizen today, but it just meant we were getting the citizenship papers.  We will present these papers when we land in Seattle, and as soon as we cross through customs there, she will officially be an American.  Don and I got dressed up for the occasion, but unfortunately, our camera and cell phone were not allowed in.  Don attempted to take a photo of us standing in line and the security guard yelled at him to delete the photo and came over to make sure that he did.  The only photo that was allowed was later in the lobby of the building ~ nowhere near where the ceremony actually took place.  There were quite a number of American adoptive families there with us and pretty much all of the kids were running around and playing with the waiting room toys.  Wu Yi remains stoic and will not engage in any kind of play.  She sat quietly in the chair and mostly looked at her hands.
We went out for a wonderful Vietnamese lunch with our friends, and then split up for the walk back to the hotel ~ WuYi and I to McD's for fries and ice cream (she loves both), and Don to the "Pepsi store" with Brad.  When we met back in our room, we learned that Don had gotten into more trouble with his camera, for stopping in front of a Communist Party building and trying to take photos.  The 6 guards at the gate (complete with bayonets!) didn't appreciate him pointing a camera at them, and one of them quickly approached him and told him to delete all photos.  There may be more to the story if you talk to Don himself ~ the details become more frightening every time he tells them! :)  We later drove by that same building again, and Don slumped down in his seat as far as he could with his camera flashing away through the window of the moving van.  All this for a picture of a Red Star to show the students in his government class.
We spent the afternoon visiting the Chen Ancestral Hall/Guangzhou Fine Arts Museum and the Pearl Market (a popular downtown mall), and spent the evening on a river boat dinner cruise.  The food on the cruise was the first meal I have not enjoyed, but there were alot of American adoptive families on board and the ride was fun.  Guangzhou is a wealthy major seaport for southern China and its modern skyscrapers and bridges are adorned with neon lights that create quite a show at night.  Wu Yi was bored by most of the days activities, but I think she enjoyed being on the boat. 
It was late by the time we returned to the hotel, and all Wu Yi wanted to do was watch the new "Pleasant Goat" DVD we bought for her.  This cartoon seems to be China's most popular for the younger kids and she waited all day to watch it.  She didn't even show any interest in making a phone call today.  I am happy to report that Wu Yi has not cried for 3 full days.  Unfortunately, with no phone calls to the orphanage, we didn't get to hear her say a single word today.  Despite seeming less angry, she is still very quiet and very stubborn about showing interest in any kind of play.  She understands the simple Chinese phrases I say to her and nods yes or no to my questions.  I feel bad that I haven't been able to understand anything she says to me and she gave up trying after the second day.  We have free days to sightsee on our own after tomorrow and we are going to find more kid friendly places.  She likes feeding animals and there is a nice zoo here ~ looking forward to that!  There is also a Washington family that just arrived in our hotel with their new 6 year old daughter and we are meeting them tomorrow night for dinner.  I hope the two girls are interested in each other!  Maybe we can get Wu Yi a little more out of her shell!